14 Kislev · Yahrzeit
Reuven ben Yaakov Avinu - 12 Tribes
14 Kislev – Yahrzeit of Reuven ben Yaakov Avinu
Reuven (ראובן) — the eldest son of the patriarch Yaakov and his wife Leah, one of the progenitors of the 12 Tribes of Israel.
Years of Reuven's life: 2192—2317 (1568-1443 BCE).
He was born in Charan on 14 Kislev, 2192 (1568 BCE), when his father Yaakov was 84 years old (Bereishit 29:32; Yalkut Shimoni 162).
As those knowledgeable in the hidden teachings note, Reuven – Yaakov's firstborn – was a new incarnation (gilgul) of the soul of Cain, the first son of Adam. (Seder HaDorot)
After his birth, his mother Leah declared: "G-d has seen my affliction (רָאָה בְּעָנְיִי), and now my husband will love me" — and so the child was named Reuven (רְאוּבֵן). (Bereishit 29:32)
This name also captured Leah's joyful exclamation: "Look — a son (רְאוּ בֵּן — re'u ben)! G-d has given me a son!" (Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer 36).
In this seemingly spontaneous exclamation of the mother lay a hidden prophecy: "Look, my son will not be like the son of my father-in-law (i.e., Esav), who willingly sold his birthright to Yaakov and then hated him for it! But when in the future Yaakov takes away my son's birthright and gives it to Yosef — the son of my sister Rachel — Reuven will not only bear no grudge against Yosef, but will try to save him from trouble." (Berachot 7b, Rashi)
When Reuven was 13 years old, the family returned from Charan to Yaakov's homeland, the land of Canaan. (Bereishit 31:17-18)
Soon the family reached Hevron, and here fifteen-year-old Reuven first saw his righteous grandfather Yitzchak and studied Torah with him. (Shemot Rabbah 1:1)
During this same period, Reuven and his brothers often went out to graze the flocks in distant pastures — including in the area of Shechem, where there were vast meadows. In 2213 (1547 BCE), during one of these distant journeys, Reuven took part in an armed clash with the armies of seven Canaanite kings, who tried to avenge the death of the people of Shechem upon Yaakov's family — this clash ended with the conclusion of a peace treaty. (Yalkut Shimoni 133)
In 2214 (1546 BCE), his mother Leah died in Hevron. She was buried in the family tomb — the Cave of Machpelah. (Seder HaDorot)
Three key events are connected with Reuven — Yaakov's firstborn from Leah:
– He brought his mother the duda'im;
– He moved Yaakov's bed (bedding) away from the tent of Bilhah;
– He did not take part in selling Yosef, even though Yaakov favored Yosef, who was a contender for the birthright.
The Duda'im
Duda'im (mandrakes) — the outward appearance of this plant's root resembles a little human figure; interestingly, the gematria of the word דודאים equals the expression כאדם "ke-adam" (like a person) = 65. (Baal HaTurim, Bereishit 30:14)
The Zohar HaKadosh says: "If you say that the duda'im opened Rachel's womb, this is not so, for it is written: 'And G-d heard her and opened her womb'" — meaning that Hashem made her able to bear children. And although duda'im assist in conception, they cannot cause a barren woman to conceive, since birth depends on mazal. But duda'im can help those women whose conception is hindered by some other cause, but who are not barren, and who, according to their mazal, are destined to give birth." (Zohar, Vayeitzei 156b-157a)
The gematria of חטא עץ הדעת טוב ורע – "cheit eitz hada'at tov vara" – (the sin of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil) — is the same as that of וַיִּמְצָא דוּדָאִים בַּשָּׂדֶה וַיָּבֵא אֹתָם אֶללֵאָה – "vayimtza duda'im basadeh vayave otam el Leah" — (he found duda'im in the field and brought them to Leah).
Leah's exchanging the duda'im is a tikun (rectification) for Esav's transgression of selling his birthright.
Esav said: "Behold, I am about to die, so of what use is the birthright to me?" (Bereishit 25:32) He scorned his future spirituality for the sake of physical pleasure. Esav asked for הָאָדֹם הָאָדֹם הַזֶּה – "ha'adom, ha'adom hazeh" — (this red, red stuff). The word אָדֹם – "adom" — contains all the letters of the word דוּדָאִים – "duda'im" — דוּדָאים. The two remaining letters are יַד – "yad" – (hand) — with which one can either take or give. By giving the duda'im to Rachel in order to fulfill a mitzvah, Leah rectified Esav's sin.
Rachel too was part of this rectification, giving up her own happiness for the sake of her sister.
"And Rachel said to Leah: give me your son's duda'im." But she said to her: "Is it not enough that you have taken my husband?"
Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai taught: "Because she scorned the righteous one – she was not buried together with him."
And of this it is said: "For this reason he shall lie with you" — (he shall rest not with me, but with you) – in the Cave of Machpelah.
Rabbi Berechiah said: "Rabbi Elazar said: this one lost, and that one lost; this one gained, and that one gained. Leah lost the duda'im, but gained tribes (and the birthright); Rachel gained the duda'im, but lost tribes (and the birthright)."
Rabbi Shmuel bar Nachman said: "Leah lost the duda'im, but gained tribes and burial (beside her husband); Rachel gained the duda'im, but lost tribes and burial (beside her husband)."
Relying on the duda'im as a segula against infertility, Rachel in the end did not conceive and lost the night with Yaakov;
Leah, however, merited two sons – Yissachar and Zevulun – for exchanging the duda'im for a night with Yaakov.
Rabbi Levi said: "Come and see how wonderful was the mediation of these duda'im, for through them two tribes of Israel arose – Yissachar and Zevulun."
It is said in Shir HaShirim (7:14): "The duda'im gave forth their fragrance" — and to this day this fragrance of the duda'im embodies Yissachar and Zevulun — where one studies Torah with the support of the other.
Another secret of the duda'im can be found within the word duda'im itself, if it is split into two words: דוּדָאִים — אם דָּוִיד – "im David" — meaning "if David." Through the exchange involving the duda'im, David and Mashiach were conceived. Another way to read the same letters — אם דָּוִיד — is "em David" — the mother of David. Through exchanging the duda'im for a night with Yaakov, Rachel became the spiritual mother of David and Mashiach. In the merit of Rachel, Hashem will gather the exiles and bring the redemption.
2) He Lay on His Father's Bed in Bilhah's Tent
On the way to the city of Hevron, on 11 Cheshvan, 2207 (1554 BCE), Rachel, Yaakov's second wife, died in childbirth — and some time after this, Yaakov moved his bed into the tent of Rachel's maidservant, Bilhah. Wounded by this, Reuven took it upon himself to move his father's bed into the dwelling of his mother Leah, saying: "If my mother's sister was previously her rival, shall her rival now be her sister's maidservant?!" (Bereishit 35:16-22)
From the Torah we learn that after Rachel's death, Yaakov moved his bed into Bilhah's tent because the Shechinah rested there, rather than into the tent of his elder wife Leah. The Zohar notes that Reuven showed extreme disrespect toward his father and G-d when he demonstratively lay on Bilhah's bed, seeking to defend the honor of his mother Leah's family. This is how we must understand the verse in Parashat Vayishlach: "Reuven went and lay with Bilhah, his father's concubine..." (35:22) – he lay not with her, but on her bed. The Zohar suggests that Reuven lay on Bilhah's bed because he thought that Yaakov wanted more children, and it seems that he and his brothers sinned [in judging their father].
For this transgression, Yaakov took away Reuven's birthright, which passed to Yosef — the firstborn of Rachel (I Divrei HaYamim 5:1; Maharsha, Bava Batra 123a).
When the family returned to Hevron – fifteen-year-old Reuven saw his righteous grandfather Yitzchak for the first time. Over the next several years Reuven studied the foundations of Divine wisdom under the guidance of his father and grandfather. (Shemot Rabbah 1:1).
When the brothers decided to kill Yosef because of his lashon hara, Reuven alone was against it: "Do not harm the boy! He is still too young and does not deserve the death penalty! And of course he did not wish for our death, as it seemed to you." (Bereishit 37:21, 42:22, Sforno)
And when the other brothers began to insist on the death penalty, Reuven still tried to save Yosef, saying: "Let us not kill him! Shed no blood! Throw him into this pit in the wilderness, but do not lay a hand on him!" (Bereishit 37:22).
The brothers understood him to mean that he too agreed to have Yosef executed, but was only suggesting a method of execution that would leave no blood of their brother on their hands. (Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer 38) In reality, however, Reuven intended to wait for a convenient moment, pull Yosef out of the pit, and return him to his father. (Bereishit 37:22; Makkot 10a)
Reuven feared that his father would blame him in particular for Yosef's death — as the eldest of the brothers, who could and should have stopped the others. Moreover, his father might suspect him of using the situation to take revenge on Yosef for having been given the birthright. (Bereishit Rabbah 94:15)
The brothers decided to put him into a deep pit: if he was innocent, he would be saved, and if guilty, he would perish in the wilderness.
As soon as Yosef approached, they tore off the long striped coat their father had given him and threw him into the pit (Bereishit 37:23–24).
When the brothers sat down to eat, Reuven withdrew to wait for a convenient moment to free Yosef – he hoped that if he managed to save Yosef, his father would also forgive him for his earlier sin. (Bereishit Rabbah 84:19).
When it grew dark, Reuven returned to the pit, but there was no one there. He thought that Yosef had died of fright or had been bitten by a poisonous snake, and that the brothers had removed his body. Reuven, in grief, tore his clothes and, returning to his brothers, said: "The boy is not in the pit! If Yosef is dead, how can I return to my father?!" (Bereishit 37:29-30)
Then the brothers told him how passing merchants had pulled Yosef out of the pit and led him away into slavery. "What have you done?!" Reuven asked bitterly. "Now our father will go down to his grave in grief!" In response, the brothers told him that they had sworn to one another not to reveal to their father what had really happened — and Reuven joined in their oath. (Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer 38)
In council together, they decided to soak Yosef's striped coat in the blood of a slaughtered kid and bring it to their father, claiming they had found the coat in the wilderness. (Bereishit 37:31-32)
By saving his brother from execution, Reuven rectified the sin of fratricide committed by Adam's first son, Cain.
Yaakov's blessing: "Reuven, my firstborn, my strength and the first of my might, foremost in rank and foremost in power."
May the merit of Reuven ben Yaakov protect our people!
(from the website Tzadikim.com)
Pilgrimage site:
Grave: Yaakov Avinu