Tehillim 68 – Why Is a Shidduch Compared to the Splitting of the Sea

Tehillim 68 – why is a Shidduch compared to the Splitting of the Sea

Tehillim 68:7 - “Elohim moshiv yechidim bayta motzi asirim ba-kosharot ach sorerim shakhnu tzekhikha” - (G-d brings the lonely home and releases prisoners from their chains.) The Talmud compares finding one’s soulmate (kindred soul) to the splitting of the Yam Suf: Rabbi Yochanan said that making a match in marriage is as difficult as the splitting of the Yam Suf, as it says: “G-d brings the lonely home and releases prisoners from their chains.” (Babylonian Talmud, Sotah 2b). It is difficult to understand why matchmaking and the splitting of the sea are considered קָשֶׁה – “kashe” – (difficult) for Hashem. What could be difficult for the Almighty? Chazon Ish, may the memory of the righteous be a blessing, explains that the word “kashe” does not necessarily mean (difficult), since nothing is difficult for the Master of the Universe. Rather, he writes, קָשֶׁה – “kashe” refers to G-d’s intervention in the natural flow of cause and effect. When G-d openly suspends the laws of nature, this is called “kashe” – (difficult). Both shidduchim and the Splitting of the Sea constitute an open intervention in nature. (Rabbi Eliezer Eisenberg) The Talmud speaks of the predestination of a shidduch: “Forty days before the formation of the embryo, a Heavenly voice goes forth and proclaims: ‘The daughter of so-and-so is destined for so-and-so.’” (BT, Sotah 2b) Likewise, the splitting of the Red Sea was predestined, as it says: “Moses stretched out his hand over the sea, and toward morning the sea returned to its strength…” (Shemot 14:27) The word לְאֵיתָנוֹ – “le-eitano” – (to its strength) can be interpreted as “to its original state.” The Midrash explains that the Red Sea was created on the condition that it would split for the Israelites. (Midrash Bereishit Rabbah 5:5) Thus, the splitting of the sea was predestined just as souls are destined for one another even before birth. The “difficulty” is that although they are predestined, G-d holds back their meeting until we are worthy of having it take place through our steadfast emunah (faith), sincere prayer, and hishtadlut (effort). We need complete faith that the very fact that we have not yet found our soulmate means that, ultimately, we truly will find our soulmate at the right time—a time known only to G-d. (Rabbanit Chana Bracha Siegelbaum on Parashat Beshalach)